Growing Feminine, Dream excerpted from Cauldron of the Feminine, Book Three. Coming Winter 2019.

Growing Feminine
A male social studies consultant colleague and I are transferred from Regional Services to another branch of Alberta Education. The details are sketchy. We are at the new department. Someone suggests we have been fired and that’s why we are new here. There is a meeting in a different part of the complex. We walk through many hallways and passages. I mention I could never find my way back to where we started.
hallways and passages. I mention I could never find my way back to where we started.

The meeting over, we head off to another area. I am riding an open sort of go-cart and a train, low to the ground, which has no sidebars, and rides over a flat surface. A blond woman from social studies curriculum rides behind me. The vehicle travels through the complex. There are open areas everywhere. We go over water. Green plants surround us. It is all very light. I tell my social studies colleague I will never find my way to my black zipper briefcase.

Then I am searching for my car, which is parked somewhere in the open lot. When I find it, Rachel is with me. From nowhere, a wall of water rushes from the right and washes over the car. I like the water.

Awakening to work with the dream, I sketch and colour green pages. There are several feminine, growth-oriented and organic motifs in the dream. A complex, hallways, passages, open areas, green plants, light and water are all feminine, all suggestive of the inner labyrinth, birth canal and possibly rebirth. According to Jungian understandings, the labyrinth has the “meaning of an entangling and confusing representation of the world of matriarchal consciousness. It can be traversed only by those who are ready for a special initiation into the mysterious world of the collective unconscious.” There is unconventional movement, suggestions of an inability to “find my way back.” I can’t see where I left my old self. A younger version, my daughter, is in the car when I find it. The rushing water symbolizes birth as it washes right over me. The world of feminine and masculine energies is a vast confusion for neophytes such as me. I marvel often at the degree, distance and depth to which I am led. I pray. Always.

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