I, the Woman, Planted the Tree
A Journey through Dreams to the Feminine
Yet another nightmare, one more black depression, hearing voices, more psychiatric appointments, the threat of foreclosure, and disappointment in God, her Catholic church and her weak faith–a midlife mother, wife and high school administrator embarks on a frantic journey to heal clinical depression.
Months later, a member of her large family, concerned about her possible involvement with the occult, sends her a large box of books. One book about dreams begins a lifetime of inner work with a dream of falling, prayer and a safe landing. This is the story of Pearl Gregor’s deep and arduous journey into the darkness with the light of dreams to guide her. Little did she know, but that first dream held the energy of the archetypal descent to the underworld. Within every woman lies the energy of the Sumerian myth of Inanna.
A few months and a few thousand mantras after her first Sunday evening meditation, strangely mystical experiences, transcendent light, and a deeply moving vision of sunflowers, seeds, a forest of trees and a beautiful river of silver coins promise deep joy and healing. A series of events including a charismatic breakfast healing service releases floods of energy. After more weeks of intense inner work, the memory of preverbal childhood sexual molestation emerges. From deep within, floods of intense energy transformed her very cellular structure.
The clinical depression never returned. That should have marked the end of the story. Everlasting peace, miracles and sublime peacefulness. Right? No. Only in the movies and televangelism. Pearl’s soul journey took her through the repressed emotions of early childhood trauma and its impact on body, mind and spirit. Through dreams, Pearl learned to question every detail of deeply held and centuries old tribal beliefs. Such a process of finding the repressed feminine, aspects of the goddess and eroding deeply held fears in search of the authentic self requires hard work. The truth is it would take years to integrate, assimilate, and accept that these experiences were in fact real. The path leads through dreams, multitudes of books on feminism, Jungian psychology, spirituality, Catholicism, religion and history. While the road is strewn with barriers, boulders and bogey men, it also provides the resources to work with deeply symbolic material arising through dreams. This book contains 66 life-changing, healing, frightening and transformational dreams as ancient as the Eleusinian Blood Mysteries. Pearl filled dozens of journals.
In her relentless search for her own authority, she learned the depth of generations of inherited cultural constructs about woman’s invisibility, passivity, insignificance and silence. Struggling with fears of ridicule and alienation, and the crushing weight of unhinging the many fixed positions of educated, liberal arts, progressive, spiritual, religious and scientific beliefs, Pearl managed to establish the right to her own beliefs.
This is her story of life seen through the eyes of a midlife woman and her spiritual transformation on the way to becoming Crone.Buy This Book Here!
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A moving and compelling story of one woman's journey in the discovery of self and in finding relief from the debilitating effects of clinical depression. Throughout this arduous journey, Pearl continues to unravel some of her life mysteries, while striving and succeeding in a world governed by patriarchal order, stringent church roles, expectations and constraints. As the story unfolds, you are drawn in and shown the possibilities of what alternative therapies such as dream journaling and meditation can offer, after many traditional medicines and therapies had failed. Pearl's soul journey in finding balance and in becoming, will be with you long after you have finished reading the book.